HealingRecovery 5 minutes to read

If you’ve ever watched soap operas, this phrase will sound familiar:

And these are the days of our lives.

Yep, you are correct. This phrase has been on television for 57 years! It’s crazy to think of how they could come up with so much content. This show has been on every weekday for 57 years. The writers and producers put a ton of work into creating content, to make it engaging and get people hooked.  

Just like other television shows, they often leave us with a cliffhanger. At the end, “To Be Continued” pops up and we are left hanging—wondering what happens next—until the next season starts.  

So what do we do when our own “To Be Continued” moments happen in life? In many television series, they are continuously planning, meeting deadlines, and setting up for the next filming phase. But how often do we do this in our lives? Typically, we don’t take the time to plan and set goals to help us get from where we are now to where we want to be. If we’re not willing to spend time investing in this process, how will we stay motivated to pursue health? 

With the new year, it seems like a great time to focus on our “To Be Continued:” creating a proactive plan and specific goals to keep us moving toward health.  

For many of us, life feels hard right now. The things happening in the world today affect all of us: every second, of every minute, of every day. We might think we can run from it. Just like we think we can run from our unwanted sexual behaviors. But truthfully, the saying, “You can run but you can’t hide” is so true. 

This last year was challenging; but 2022 could be so much better! 

If you’re just starting the Pure Desire process, or have been in it for a few months or longer, at various points, we write out our desired outcomes: determining where we want to be in life and how the healing process is going to help us get there. Prior to joining Pure Desire, many of us were letting the world write our “To Be Continued.” But this is your life: what you do now can, and will, make a huge impact on your healing and positively affect those around you. You may be asking yourself, What can I do to make a difference? How do I get from where I am now to where I want to be? 

Here are a few things I have learned over the years that continue to keep me moving toward health and significantly impact my “To Be Continued.”

Commit.

If you’re reading this, you just didn’t stumble onto the Pure Desire website by accident. You are here because you know you need help. You might be looking to commit to joining a weekly Pure Desire group. Or perhaps you need to commit to the counseling process. Maybe you want to learn how to be 100% committed in your relationships, or to your spouse and kids, or your job? 

When we commit to the things that really matter, we show those around us that they are important, valued, and loved. Committing to something that is life-giving is a great goal for 2022!

Challenge yourself.

In what areas have you been wounded? Typically, these are the areas we keep hidden. They hold and hide our pain and trauma. This is a common theme we all share. We have been wounded in community—wounded in significant relationships with others. And, it’s in community where we will find healing. 

Challenge yourself to be in community; to find safe people who you can be open and honest with, who will support you on this journey. Part of this process will include the members in your Pure Desire group. While this can be a very hard process, the relationships we develop will make all the difference. 

It’s about being vulnerable and letting people into your world. Not just anyone—safe, honest, and transparent people. A real, authentic community is what I am talking about. Challenge yourself to allow others to know the real you.

Choose.

For many of us, the choices we’ve made in our lives didn’t include much thought, or heart, or consideration to what our choices would produce. And now, we realize there’s a better way. We need to make the choices only we can make: choices that are healthy, not just for us but for our relationships. 

Whatever choices you’re faced with, remember: even though it’s your choice, what you choose to do now could be the most important choice you will ever make. Choosing to join a Pure Desire group. Choosing to go to counseling. Choosing to lead a group. These are the choices that will positively affect 2022! 

Commit. Challenge. Choose. Sounds pretty easy, right? 

Not so much. We’ve all been there—failed commitments, isolating from family and friends, not thinking through challenging situations, and choosing to cope with life in unhealthy ways. All the things that brought us here, trapped in unwanted behaviors. And honestly, this is where it gets tough, painful, and scary.

But God knows what’s in our past, present, and future. And He provided the way out: Jesus—the sacrifice that was given so we could live in freedom and not be tied to the pain in our lives. Jesus was committed to his Father’s plan, he faced many challenges, and made a choice so that we could live in freedom. And because of this, we don’t have to live in fear, regardless of what’s happening in our world. This can be a year of redemption for all of us!

For 2022, look at what steps you need to take to keep moving toward health. What are your three Cs? You might already know what they are, which is great! For some, it may be a day-to-day process for you, figuring out how to get from where you are now to where you want to be. Even if you’re at a baby steps level, no worries. It’s the perfect place to start!

If you don’t know what your three Cs are, use mine! Commit, Challenge yourself, and Choose are all measurable and can apply to many areas of our lives.    

When it comes to your healing, where do you want to be: next week, next month, and next year? If you don’t know where to start or have questions, reach out to us. This could be the beginning of your three Cs and the start of your “To Be Continued.”

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

2 Corinthians 4:17-18 (NIV)

Don’t miss out on the opportunity God has given you to find the life-changing healing He has waiting for you!


Rich Moore

Rich is the Associate Director of Men's Groups for Pure Desire and is a certified Pastoral Sex Addiction Professional (PSAP) through the International Institute for Trauma and Addiction Professionals (IITAP). He has been involved with Pure Desire for over 20 years and is a foundational piece to helping churches start a Pure Desire group ministry. Rich is also the author of The Silent Battle: One Man's Fight for Freedom.

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