Groups•Healing•Recovery • 4 minutes to read
Recovery is long, hard, painful, and comes with a lot of uncertainties. It brings up a lot of old wounds, some that seem to never go away and some we will never tell anyone about. There are many layers to the recovery process and, whether you are the betrayed spouse or the one struggling with unwanted sexual behavior, each layer can be even more painful. And oftentimes in the recovery process, we can get to the point where giving up would be the easiest thing to do.
I love this quote by Lance Armstrong.
Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.
Lance is spot on here. In the moment, quitting would be easier, but the pain will always be there. It’s like trying to outrun our problems; they just keep pace with us. It doesn’t matter how far or how fast we run, if we don’t face our problems head on they will always be right behind us.
Coming into the recovery process, we all have a lot of questions. Oftentimes, the biggest questions are “Where do I start?” and “What do I need?” If we think of the recovery process as a job, which in some ways it is, it takes a lot of work and commitment to complete the job. And just like any job, the recovery process uses many tools. Today I wanted to focus on what I feel is one of the biggest tools available to you: the Bible.
What I love about Pure Desire Ministries is our holistic approach. Science backed by Scripture and Scripture backed by science. As you begin the healing process in your group, the Word of God is used in the journals and sprinkled throughout the workbooks, as well as in many of the books we recommend.
See, the Bible isn’t just a collection of stories to pull out and read when we are bored and looking for something to do. It is the most important tool we have in life and in our recovery. Think of the Bible as a car: fully loaded with everything you need to get you from point A to point B. Now what happens if you never check the oil, never check the air in your tires, and really never open the hood? Well, when we neglect the things we need to do to keep our car on the road, it breaks down on us. And the same thing happens with our relationship with Christ. The Bible is our owner’s manual for life. It is the one tool we can’t go without. Sadly, for so many of us, we neglect the one tool that has all the answers.
Don’t get me wrong here; I am not saying we need to read the Bible more and pray more. This is a decision only you can make. What I am saying is that, in the recovery process, science alone won’t get you healed. It’s the Word of God that can speak deep into our souls and repair all the unwanted stuff we have been holding on to for years. The science behind recovery is great, but when paired with Scripture, real healing begins to take place.
Early on in my healing process, I was able to see this play out firsthand, while I was on probation and attending court-ordered treatment. I saw so many guys get busted again for re-offending. Though the material we were using in treatment was great, it was missing a key piece: the spiritual connection! I am so thankful for Pure Desire Ministries and that it is built on a biblical foundation. It literally saved my life. In our Pure Desire group material, you will often find Scripture throughout. One piece that is so important is the Sword Drill in the Seven Pillars of Freedom Journal. If you look at how worship is used to usher you in the presence of God to where you can receive the Word at church, I feel these Sword Drills along with a daily devotional and Scripture in the homework will do the same thing for us. It will help usher us into a place of recovery, where we are able to receive the healing that God has for us.
Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’
Matthew 4:4 (NIV)
I love this verse because it answers so many questions for me! Although we have things in our life that are good and true, oftentimes they don’t mean much; yet if paired with God, the impact will produce eternal gifts. This is so true in my life! The gifts I have experienced from being involved with Pure Desire for over 25 years continue to bear fruit, as I made the decision to walk in His Word and recover every day. The greatest gift we were ever given was His Son, Jesus. The tools available to us through His Word will be forever etched in our lives if we choose.
When the recovery work is tough, and it is tough at times, I often find myself turning to this song. It helps me take the focus off what is going on around me and focus on Him. My story is simple really: without God there would have been no Dr. Ted and Diane Roberts, and no Pure Desire Ministries. I would have been sentenced to prison for 49 years. And I would have been unable to help thousands of men and women around the world who are struggling. Every day, I thank God that we (Pure Desire) are here for you.
Take a moment to listen to this song and let the Holy Spirit begin to guide you in your recovery journey.
The views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are those of the author alone and do not reflect an official position of Pure Desire Ministries, except where expressly stated.
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Thank you for sharing this insightful blog post. I appreciate the emphasis on the Bible being a crucial tool in the recovery process, backed by both science and scripture. Something I absolutely believe, as God is the Ultimate Scientist, like I’ve always said.
My question is, how do you recommend integrating the Bible into the recovery process for those who may not have a strong foundation in scripture or struggle with understanding it?
XOXO,
Kiddo Elliott
https://sweetdreamsguide.com/
Hi Kiddo,
Thank you so much for the comment. After leading groups for over 25 years now, I have had many guys come into my groups who were either nonbelievers or really angry with God and fell away from him. When an individual approaches me in regard to their belief, I just encourage them. I don’t throw scripture at them. I just love them where they are at. Even in my own recovery process, I was so angry with God and really struggled to trust his word. But over time, the holy spirit just kept seeping into my life. No one pressured me, no one told me the process wouldn’t work, they just cared for me where I was at. So many men and women come to us for help regardless of their faith. And though scripture and prayer are part of the process, if one chooses not to take part in that portion, that is ok. The recover process is all about self discovery, and faith can be that way as well, they have to seek it out if the choose.
What I have found that works the best in those situations, is that if we encourage, love on, and help them walk in recovery and help them to see what real community looks like, what real transparency and vulnerability looks like, they begin to ask questions. Questions like, Is there really a God? How can you trust someone you can’t see? Is healing even possible? and so many others. Then I just share my story, on what God did in my life and how he brought me out of the grips of hell.
When we can show compassion and love while being vulnerable and honest in our recovery process, those that struggle with their faith will begin to see God at work, and then those questions about God turn to, How can I have what you have, Is that even possible for me? I have walked a lot of guys through accepting Christ during the group process. And that was all by me just being me. Real, vulnerable, honest, sharing my struggles, and not having all the answers. Just being me! And accepting them right where they are. I look at it like the mustard seed.
Matthew 17:20
He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”
What happens in the group process, is that those seeds are being planted and they don’t even know it. When we get to the point in our own recovery and can truly begin to love ourselves like Christ loves us, we are able to show that love and acceptance to others. We start being His Hands extended to a hurting world!
I could not agree more with all you have said here, especially about how those struggling with their faith can see God’s work through us as we act based on our own faith. Not quote and preach, just doing our life as we think we should given our love of God. It works perfectly, too, like you said because then eventually they will ASK YOU basically, “what’s your secret for being so happy, peaceful, loving, etc…?” Well said. Thanks for sharing such deep wisdom. Maybe you should write a book about this topic you know very well how to handle?