Recovery 5 minutes to read

If I’m being honest, I don’t love men’s conferences. Does this make me weird?

If I’m being even more honest, it tends to be because most men’s conferences are all the same. They always have great outdoor activities that give us the opportunity to do crazy stuff (let’s be honest––dangerous) we wouldn’t do with our wives around. Then there is usually great food (which I have no problem with), shipped in by the droves. And it’s usually brought in by that one guy named Steve––we see you, Steve, and we appreciate you bro!

All good stuff so far, but when you get to the spiritual aspect, it’s usually all pumped up and overdone with not-so-subtle machismo overtones. And that’s where I get lost.

The more I’ve gotten healthier over the past few years, the more I see what the overtones of masculinity really are, at least in my life. Without a doubt, it’s all insecurity creeping its stupid head into my life and letting me know he’s there. This is why the pumped up nature of men’s events really turns me off. I end up thinking that we’re all just putting on masks of masculinity and covering all the real and raw stuff that’s going on in our lives.

I find myself wanting to have those emotional—sometimes crying because life sucks so bad right now—type of conversations. I don’t need to throw an ax at a tree stump in order to be a man (though it is fun). What I need is to know that I’m normal in my insecurities and that God is faithful to surround me with others who are in the same boat. I desire to be part of a community of men who know it’s okay to not be okay. And even further, it’s okay to show that I’m not okay.

All this is amplified even more when struggles with sexual integrity and purity are in the picture. The shame factor just amps up to 13!

For some of the reasons I’ve listed and more, at Pure Desire, we want to offer a men’s conference that is real, raw, and goes for the jugular of life as a man.

Whether it’s focused on how to be a man with sexual integrity in arguably the most difficult time to be one or a crippling concern for our sons and daughters as they enter the waters of sexuality in our culture, it’s imperative to have the right information, tools, and community to help create, maintain, and train sexual integrity.

If you’re anything like me, would you consider trying out this year’s Pure Desire Men conference in Troutdale, Oregon?

Here’s a quick snapshot of what you’re in for:


One of my favorite people in the WHOLE WORLD is Mr. Rodney Wright. If you’ve met Rodney, heard him speak, or heard him on our podcast, you know what I’m talking about.

Someone who steps up with energy and just brings a raw authenticity and humility to the room. Rodney has been a pastor and in ministry leadership for a couple of decades, and as he leans on that experience, he’ll kick us off with a session on how to be in relationship not just do relationship. Being intentional, focused, and present in our relationships is essential to living the life Christ has for us. And Rodney will give us just the right amount of energy to start our morning off right!


Our featured speaker is a new friend of ours––Jay Stringer. Jay is a counselor, minister, and author. He recently authored an incredible book, Unwanted, and we are proud to be affiliated with such a wise and tide-changing guy!

He’s going to show us how our past really isn’t in the past, how it plays out in our now, and how it will continue to do so in our future unless we process it intentionally. Jay will show us the hole in our sexual wholeness and talk us through what a life of sexual integrity requires.


I mean, come on! Do I really need to say anything else. DR. TED!

We’ll sit down with Dr. Ted and lean into his 30+ years of experience in the field of sexual brokenness. We’ll hear his one-of-a-kind perspective on the battle of turning our brokenness into a weapon for the kingdom.

Seriously, you won’t want to miss this!


All our speakers will be answering as many questions as we can from the conference attendees. This is usually one of our favorite sessions because we get to hear what’s going on in the world of all the men attending and speak directly to their questions.


When it comes to our thought life, we usually just chalk it up to “I’m always going to struggle to keep pure thoughts,” or “I’m always going to struggle with looking lustfully.” But Nick Stumbo will show us that we don’t have to dismiss our thought life and can truly reclaim the land of our minds for Christ.

Nick will give us practical insight and biblical wisdom on how to not only discover integrity in our thought life, but also create a sustained integrity that continues to grow more and more.


The bearded legend, Robert Vander Meer, is one of the coolest humans you’ll ever meet. He’ll be taking us back to Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood and what we can learn about living genuinely and wholly in community.

Robert will reveal the benefits of being fully known and fully loved by those around us and the power that carries in helping shape a community of grace.

I truly would encourage you to consider making this year’s Pure Desire Men conference a priority. Not only will we be blunt and real about how sexual brokenness destroys, we will also reveal how sexual integrity and wholeness are possible.

Would you join me at this year’s Pure Desire Men conference?

If so, just sign up here!

And remember, it’s okay to not be okay at this men’s conference.

The views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are those of the author alone and do not reflect an official position of Pure Desire Ministries, except where expressly stated.

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Trevor Winsor

Trevor is the Marketing Director for Pure Desire. He has been in ministry leadership for 10 years. Trevor is a certified Pastoral Sex Addiction Professional (PSAP) through the International Institute of Addiction and Trauma Professionals (IITAP). He has a Bachelor’s in Psychology from Corban University, a Master’s in Ministry & Leadership from Western Seminary, and is a licensed pastor. Trevor is passionate about integrating trauma and addiction healing with spiritual disciplines to produce holistic healing.

1 Comment

  1. Carol Basile

    When will you be coming to Southern CA for a conference?

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