Designed for group use, the Betrayal & Beyond Workbook reveals the truth and nature of sexual addiction, and how women are wounded by the addict’s behaviors. For women who have suffered betrayal, their healing comes from understanding the role of trauma, establishing healthy boundaries, exploring the depth of forgiveness, and learning to live in restoration.
The Betrayal & Beyond Journal is a companion resource that reinforces the daily commitment to health through several foundational tools:
– August 13, 2019
Going through this book has changed my life and I am so grateful to have this resource
– September 2, 2019
It’s a true commitment to change in order to obtain healing. Very rewarding…I strongly recommend this course to women who are and have suffered from betrayal.
– November 28, 2019
To have suffered a betrayal was the most difficult time of my life I was broken and didn’t know how I could survive I was devastated but God brought this beautiful angel into my life She told me about this course The opportunity to study the material and share with other women has given me the strength to survive and now live It has giving me so much more strength I highly recommend this course
– January 11, 2020
When I discovered my husband was having a long-term affair 5 years ago, an emotional tornado ravaged and decimated our family. A pastor’s wife introduced me to Betrayal and Beyond, and the online group and biblically-based curriculum were a lifeline as I have slowly healed from betrayal trauma.
– August 7, 2020
These books were awesome for helping me discover and name The brokenness (safety issues, voiceless and alone feeling) that started when my Mother remarried when I was 12, and my stepfather had sexual addiction . That brokenness spilled over into my destructive marriage.
The books help me see that I had growing in maturity to do also. The books are very good at explaining why we react/do the behaviors we have after betrayal. Not only does it help you get your life back, it melds you into the person God created you to be-whole and unafraid!
– January 3, 2022
The research this book is based on is horribly outdated. This book is a confused and contradictory mix of codependency-model and trauma-model approach to healing from betrayal trauma. If you want to spend months and a lot of money excusing your partner’s behavior and looking at your own “baggage,” (which has nothing to do with your partner being a sexual addict, by the way), buy this book and sign up for a Betrayal and Beyond Group. Just be prepared for the high probability of being invalidated, re-traumatized, and out a few hundred dollars when you decide to get trauma-informed help that is not based on decades old research.
Also, for those who are inclined toward Pure Desire for religious or faith-based reasons, you will find some great scripture-twisting to make you feel worse about your responses to the choices your partner made (which, again, have nothing to do with you or your childhood). One stellar example is the twisting of the story of Abigail and Nabal. In truth, Nabal is abusive and puts his family and household in danger. Abigail is bold, courageous, and selfless, doing the almost unthinkable in her time by speaking up in effort to save her life and the lives of her family and household. But Betrayal and Beyond tells us that Abigail was codependent because she stepped in to rescue Nabal from suffering his own consequences. Is that what you would call it? I see a woman who was likely going to be killed because her husband was an abusive, prideful tyrant, and she took action to save herself and those she loved from the consequences of his abuse and neglect.
When you start feeling like it would be right to hold your partner to a standard and to call a spade a spade, by acknowledging that a partner who lies, deceives, manipulates, gaslights, and cheats in his marriage is abusive and unsafe, get ready for Betrayal and Beyond to offer you their take on Matthew 7:3-5. According to Betrayal and Beyond, we betrayed spouses are called to examine ourselves for ways we contribute to the dysfunction in our partnerships by taking the log out of our own eye so that we may see the speck in our unfaithful and abusive partner’s eye. That’s right, our codependent, childhood trauma-fueled sin is an enormous log compared to the tiny speck of our partners’ dishonest, unfaithful, manipulative, abusive sin. Never mind that most sexual addicts and abusers will be more than willing to point out the log in your eye for you. Most of us who are married to a sexual addict know that accepting any responsibility for dysfunction or unhealth in our partnership will open wide the door for our partner to shift blame onto us and scapegoat us to avoid taking responsibility for their choices.
The worst part about this book is that Pure Desire knows how outdated and potentially harmful it is. And yet, here, they offer it to you as an opportunity for healing. Cheers!
Pure Desire Team
– January 25, 2022
Thank you for your honest feedback on Betrayal and Beyond. We always appreciate hearing feedback about our resources. We are aware of the changing landscape of women’s betrayal research, and for this reason, we are completely updating and rewriting the Betrayal and Beyond workbook. This project is currently underway and will be released here in 2022. The work is being done by several women on our team who are APSATS trained.
Although we are revising Betrayal & Beyond to use updated partner sensitive language, the majority of women are still finding the material and group experience life-changing as it helps them understand addiction, how past trauma issues impact them and their spouse, how to establish healthy boundaries, and determining whether or not to stay in the relationship.
Thank you again for your feedback. Information like this will help us continue to improve and help many more women in the future.
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